I’m having a rough day.
Work woes coupled with cancer woes added to the fact that I can’t help with the boys.
The fact that I can’t roll around and laugh and giggle and tickle my babies is hurting me, but at least I get to watch them do that with their daddy.
The fact that when they yell because they need something, they automatically yell for daddy now, hurts a hell of a lot more than I thought it would. The simple fact that I can’t get my baby the juice he wants or the ketchup he needs or whatever is breaking my heart into a million pieces.
Then there is work – my business, the business that I fell into but took over fully as my own, that has slipped into this long-lasting economic downturn resulting in me having to make some changes. Changes that would be so much easier if *I* could go in and work. If I could work the floor and reduce payroll that way…But I can’t. I’m stuck on my couch for now and then who knows for how long once whatever treatment I have to do starts. I’m praying for a fairy godfather to bestow some cash …
Oct 5 2009
