So I had that meeting today.
I will say merely this: I was not surprised at how it went. It was a 3 hr meeting during which defensive things were said while claiming non-defensive behavior. It was par for the course, not altogether satisfactory, but not altogether unsatisfactory.
SIGH.
I learned this: there are 2 sides to every story, and I know which side I tend to believe; there are changes to be made where I can make them and other changes that won’t happen no matter what I do.
I choose not to focus on the things I can’t change. I will not coddle or lose my focus.
I will bring this business back. It won’t be easy, but I will do it. I will not accept threats, veiled or not. It is MINE and I will revive it.
(Looky there, I think I may have found my passion for the office again…huh).
Well, THAT was fun
I pretty much suck at being the boss
I was dropped into owning my own business.
I’m not very good at it.
Maybe if I hadn’t had kids I would’ve been able to devote more time to it, to nurture it and make it thrive. But that’s a bell that can’t (and would never) be unrung.
The last couple of years have been rough financially – the economy in Michigan has sucked for awhile, but 2009 hit us HARD. Add that to the fact that our costs of doing business not only didn’t decrease, but increased, and we had to make some changes that weren’t very popular among my staff.
My girls have their quirks, but they are loyal, and by making those unpopular changes (cutting overtime, paid time off), I thought I was being loyal to them. My best option, honestly, was to let go of one of my employees, but I chose not to do that. That was probably a mistake.
But my biggest mistake? Was letting the doctor that works for me walk all over me and my staff. I was so caught up in the worry of him walking away when I needed a doctor on staff the most, that I failed them and me. They (and me) all …
Tomorrow (updated at 6:33pm)
Tomorrow I will get all of my paperwork sorted and organized.
Tomorrow I will make a plan, put it in writing and get it implemented to get myself out of this deep hole I have fallen into. (Partially finished…still working on the budget though)
Tomorrow I will ask for help where I need it. (may need more help, hehe)
Tomorrow I will ignore the phone, fax and messages (except Twitter, of course, DUH) so that I can actually think clearly.
Tomorrow I will take frequent breaks and rest with my leg up.
Tomorrow I will call about the swelling in my leg and how to help reduce that on a daily basis.
Tomorrow I will start something AND finish it.
Tomorrow I will bask in the silence of a house missing two boys and a man but only because it allows to me to accomplish something important.
Tomorrow I will put things behind me and start fresh.
Tomorrow I will regain control of my life, no excuses.
Tomorrow, I will own my choices, good and bad, and I will move forward, not looking back.
Tomorrow, I will start to find ME again. (the process has started! More to do though….)
What are you doing tomorrow?
