I keep wanting to write one of those “if something happens to me” letters to my husband and kids. Well, want to is the wrong way to say it…need to maybe.
But I can’t.
I know I’ll be fine, but in the back of my mind I want to be prepared.
Then today, while we were driving home from appointments, I realized that Mike is exactly the guy I want raising my kids, teaching them the important things in life, traveling to places we all dream about. He’s the guy and if, god forbid, something happens, I have absolute faith that he knows what to do. And I told him so.
No letter necessary. (Thank god, because seriously, I couldn’t stop sobbing each time I tried!)
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The outpouring of support for me lately has been amazing. Unbelievable, really. People from all of the US, Canada and other countries are sending love and prayers and good thoughts. At least three churches have me on their prayer lists. It’s crazy and oh so nice.
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My friend Sunshine wrote a beautiful blog post today for/about me. Dammit if she didn’t make me cry!
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My surgery tomorrow is at noon and is supposed to last 3-4 hours. Looks …
If something happens
Smart kid
Tonight, when we were eating dinner (nothing fancy, just grilled pork loin and mashed potatoes), Preston looked at me and said “Isn’t this a great dinner? What a good day!”
I smiled and agreed, but I was still coming down from a somewhat icky day at work, so I didn’t really mean it as much as he did.
After dinner, we all went for a walk together around the neighborhood. The temperature was perfect, the sun just setting and everyone happy from a good meal and day. The boys were taking turns walking Daisy and chatting about houses and halloween costume ideas and nothing in particular and Preston looked over at me and said “This is like the best day! Isn’t this a good day, mom?”
That time, I agreed. And I meant it.
These boys
These boys…this man and these boys….they hold my heart in their very hands; they walk around with it and I am left breathless. They love and laugh; they argue and debate. They are my guys, the very loves of my life. In thick and thin, in laughter and tears, in sickness and pain, in morning and night and every moment in between. They are mine and I am the luckiest person alive.
It’s the moments
I left Matt’s soccer practice early tonight to go get my haircut (which I’ve been in desperate need for!). After a frustrating time this morning and then again this evening getting them out of the house and into the car to get someplace ON TIME and not late, I was ready for the alone time.
Tonight was my “long” haircut – which means I’m usually there for a couple of hours because it’s color and cut. My stylist was running late (as usual) so I spent some quality time cleaning out my purse, catching up on Twitter and drinking my Starbucks.
It was almost 10 by the time I got home, and selfishly, I sat down to eat before going up to say goodnight to the boys (mama does enjoy hot food every once in a while you know!)
Matt was just about to get to sleep and Preston was already out. Talking to Matt and looking at P, I decided to grab my camera. They aren’t quiet and still often, and now I can look back days years from now and feel the same rush of love as I did tonight. Man, do I love those boys.
