Rainbow connection

I’m not sure if it’s the surgery recovery, hormones, my medications or just the cancer, but holy crap my emotions are all over the place!

Two nights ago I was crying over stuffed animals I know I bought the boys for Easter and could not find anywhere.
A few days ago and today, episodes of Boy Meets World were getting to me.

Tonight? The boys and I sat down to finally watch The Muppets and lo and behold, the moment the first plings of banjo started for Rainbow Connection, I was in tears!! And then again, at the end.

I absolutely adored The Muppets as a kid and this movie made me so happy.

I’m a mess.

Today I asked the boys if I could take Comfy Mr. Bear* to the hospital with me if I had to go back in. Matt spun right around and asked “Why would you have to go back in?” I answered with a simple “well, you never know…I’ll know more after I see the doctor again”.

Oof. Once we talk to Dr. L on the 18th and determine a course of action for my treatment we are going to have to talk to the boys. Dreading that.

My recovery is going…slowly but surely. The mornings start out so well, but by mid-day I’m just sore and tired. It’s frustrating, but I’m staying in bed or on the couch. I need to be healthy to face the next stage of this.

It’s been fairly easy so far, but it’s becoming painfully obvious that since this surgery wasn’t entirely successful, the road ahead is going to require some serious fight.

*Comfy Mr.Bear is an identical bear to Preston’s Mr. Bear we bought as a just in case. P never took to him, therefore, he stayed cuddly and fuzzy, unlike the beloved (and very threadbare) original Mr. Bear.