Here we go again

February 10, 2012 · 7 comments

After numerous phone calls and countless hours WAITING and WAITING for a return phone call from the message that was left by my oncologist, I FINALLY heard back, not once, but twice tonight.

It turns out that the CT scan I had on Monday showed not only the [supposed] ovarian cyst still there, but also about 5 enlarged lymph nodes.  They are all in one area of the lower abdomen, so that’s “good” news. Lungs, heart, rest of torso all looked good on the scan.

What does it mean, you ask? Well, it means a needle biopsy in the next couple of weeks to see what little secrets the lymph nodes that are swollen are keeping.  Could be melanoma again, could be…well, something else. If it’s melanoma, then surgery is in my near future (again). And we go from there.  I’m certainly not ready to start looking beyond the biopsy.  I know what’s out there, but I am not crossing that bridge before we get to it, thank you very much.

I also have a MRI scheduled for Wednesday – they’re gonna check out my brain (and make sure it’s still there, I guess). I don’t mind the MRI so much, especially since I do appreciate its life saving properties.

This has certainly not been the most fantastic week.

Monday – sick boy, nearly missed the CT scan, CT contrast hang-over.

Tuesday – Mike’s grandpa not doing well (he passed away peacefully after midnight)

Wednesday – Blocked call shows up on my phone so I don’t answer it. Oops. Thus began the Phone Watch 2012 and the continued phone calls to the cancer clinic. Rough night of sleep.

Thursday – oy with the waiting all day. No call, poor sleep.

Friday – continued waiting. Shopping for funeral clothes. Dreary weather.

And finally the not so happy phone call(s). Which of course resulted in the phone calls to my moms and dad. OY.

Can I start drinking now?

P.S. 3 years ago we didn’t really talk to the kids about it more than saying I had some sick pieces of my body that needed to be removed. Guess I really have to talk to them if this goes beyond biopsy, eh? Dammit.


{ 7 comments… read them below or add one }

Liv February 10, 2012 at 6:56 pm

Drink up, buttercup.

I am choosing to believe that your lymph nodes are swollen with happiness. Or something that’s happy…like jellybeans or dark chocolate or jello shots. That’s because I’m effing optimistic.



PrincessJenn February 10, 2012 at 6:56 pm

Huge hugs lady. Crossing fingers it comes back negative (the biopsy, that is. I hope the MRI still shows you have a brain *grin*)
Let me know if there’s anything I can do. xoxo


kelley @ magnetoboldtoo February 10, 2012 at 6:59 pm



sarah piazza February 10, 2012 at 7:20 pm

will hope for the best, which is NOTHING. absolutely nothing. the lymph nodes are swollen because… they’re confused.

love to you.


PsychMamma February 10, 2012 at 7:22 pm

Love, love and more love to you. One thing at a time, sweets. Fingers crossed that the lymph nodes are something minor & easily fixable. Cross the bridge of talking to the boys only when you have to.

Keeping you in my thoughts.


Thea February 11, 2012 at 11:27 am

I’m with Liv — lymph nodes have been known to swell with jelly beans AND chocolate, sometimes both at the same time.

Much love to you. Wish I were close enough to smoosh you and pour you many margaritas. xoxo


alejna February 11, 2012 at 8:47 pm

Oof. I’m sorry you had such an awful week. I’ll be thinking of you and keeping my fingers crossed that you’ll get a diagnosis of jellybeans and/or chocolate.


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